Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Self Care, Weight

Motivation & Habits

Do you remember her from my Motivation & Habits post? If not feel free to check it out!

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NOTE: I asked the woman above for permission to post this screenshot.

Well I did exactly what I intended to do but with a twist. After checking out http://www.ryschyragz.com I decided to purchase motivation items. These are items I intentionally bought in a smaller size to inspire and remind myself to stick to my healthy lifestyle. This is also a form of financial motivation for me as I do not like to waste money.

I bought 2 shirts and pants.

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I’m an XL or XXL depending on the shirt and pants size 16/18. The shirts are both medium which I didn’t plan but they were too cute to pass up. I originally bought a different pair of pants but they were out of stock. She explained what happened, apologized for it and sent me the pants below in 2 different sizes (L & XL). Not only was I pleasantly surprised by the customer service but she included a nice note saying thank you and acknowledging what happened. Now I don’t know about you but good customer service is getting harder and harder to find so when I get it I become a regular customer.

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The surprises kept coming as I tried the clothes on. I tried it on to see how much I needed to lose before any of it fit. I mean they don’t fit correctly but at least I got them on! I’m wearing the XL pants in both pictures as I was under no delusion that the Large was going to go up far enough for me to take an appropriate picture.

The shirts are both soft to the touch and feel good on. The pants have great stretch so even if they don’t look like the correct size* trust me and try them on. I’ll have an update as I lose weight and can fit them correctly. But for now I will definitely be a returning customer so I can get something that fits now 🙂

*For my exact measurements please see my April 2018 Weigh In post.

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Food, Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Weight

April 2018 Weigh In

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No Your eyes do not deceive you. I am using the same picture again but this time I am using it as a comparison. Full disclaimer the pictures below were actually taken in April however it was 3lbs ago so I feel it’s still a fair representation.

Actual Date: 5/4/2018

Weight: 227.1lbs

Measurements in inches

Chest: 46

R/L Arm: 16

Waist: 45

Hips: 51

R/L Thigh: 29.5

Goal(s):

  • Stick to some type of diet/ healthy meal plan (IP!!!)
  • Read something other than children’s books (Check)
    • The Swiss Family Robinson by Johann David Wyss
  • Exercise 3x/ wk (IP)
    • I did this 3wks in a row then not so much so mostly a win
  • Post monthly updates on/after the 8th for accountability (Fail)

Is this were I wanted to be for my first weight post in a long time? NO but I am no longer beating myself up about what I know I did or didn’t do. I know what I ate, how much I worked out and what I let distract me from my goals. This time is different because I don’t feel like a failure. I feel like a work in progress. I feel stronger and more powerful because I’m not quitting. I feel grateful my body hasn’t failed me though I have put it through way too much stress and strain. The best feeling is seeing the progress even though I didn’t think there was any. My current versus my original shows a slightly smaller body but most noticeable to me is my waist. Again I can’t tell when I look at myself because breasts are in the way but this picture shows I have made physical changes.

To my body:

Thank you for not giving up on me. Please accept my apology for the abuse and know that I will never give up on you again.

With all my heart,

JTM

Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Self Care, Weight

Motivation & Habits

If you’ve been reading my blogs you know I’ve struggled with motivation. I get inspired, do okay, get distracted, fall off, repeat. My wake up call came in the form of family pictures; see below.

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Yup, all the hard work I was doing went completely sideways when I got sick. Instead of preparing something healthy and easy, I turned to junk food. Not only did we spend a lot of money but I’m pretty sure we shaved at least 2 weeks off of our lives. The final guilt was seeing how the family pictures turned out. I looked and felt bloated, my face was still healing from the infection and the antibiotics made my normally oily skin very dry to the point of peeling so I piled on makeup that didn’t turn out right. I spent the next morning sad and depressed. Then my support system kicked in.

My husband gave me an amazing pep talk and because he’s awesome and super supportive we went to Target at 10pm so I could buy containers to help me meal prep. We ate one more garbage meal then I got to work. I meal prep’d that night. Monday I turned to the internet to keep me motivated since hubby would be at work and I had an appointment near one of my favorite restaurants.

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After an emotional appointment (nothing bad just needed to plan better). I didn’t eat perfectly but I didn’t go to the restaurant either. Tuesday was tricky because I was running errands which meant I had to have breakfast, lunch and snacks with me. Thankfully my mom was able to come and helped with my son. Afterwards we were both very hungry but instead of going to fast food we went to the grocery store. I surprised myself by buying lots of veggies and some veggie based dips (guacamole and hummus) in order to make sure all of our dinners included veggies.

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Tuesday night I still felt bloated and knew I needed to start incorporating exercise to encourage movement if you know what I mean 😉 Plus I wanted those endorphins! So again I turned to the internet. It was another late night but boy am I happy I started surfing. I found the post below and it fired me up.

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ryschyragzfitness In honor of today’s workout I had to wear this shirt 😆. I had to do what I Needed to do and not what I Wanted to do. I had to keep going when I wanted to 🛑 more than a few times. Whew 💨💨💨. I could have made excuses for why it was ok for me to stop. But I didn’t, I found my Beast Mode and #sheaintcute and kept going. So Today let’s do what we need to do and not what we want to do. Plain and simple. Your needs are the most important, not your wants. Cater to your Needs… 1. You need to eat healthy, but you want to have a donut 🍩 2. You need to move and be active, but you want to lie down instead. 3. You need to be positive, but you want to feed yourself negative talk. Get where I’m going? Master taking care of Your Needs and everything else will fit into place. I guarantee it. #aintnoexcuse #selflove #marathon #thankmelater #thankyourselfnow #fitnesslifestyle #Fitmom#needsversuswants #doit #dontquit#beautyandabeast
NOTE: I asked the woman above for permission to post this screenshot and whenever possible I contact people BEFORE posting. If I do not get permission for a post or don’t receive a reply I will only reference what I saw or post the person’s handle so it can be looked up. The exception would be quotes from Pinterest but I NEVER remove any logo/ trademarks/ watermarks because I believe the originator deserves the credit for their creative work.

I found her post so motivating that I checked out her website (www.ryschyragz.com) and planned a workout for the morning. Wednesday I not only smashed a pilates workout but I cooked dinner for the rest of the week! I wanted to keep the momentum going so I watched Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. I was hit with something to the effect of you didn’t fail if you only did 7 days of a 10 day cleanse; You succeeded for 7 days!! This hit me hard because negative talk is how I would fall off. I now look at each day as a day I succeeded. On days I’m not perfect I look at each accomplishment individually: meals, workouts, personal time, etc.

I was going to include all the individuals that inspired me but this post is long enough. Rather than give up on shining a light on those who’ve motivated me I am going to blog about them and I will include specifics if I can get permission to do so.

If you’ve gotten this far because you need motivation, I hope this helps and I hope you come back in the future when I post more of what motivates me. If you made it this far simply to read what I had to say then THANK YOU 🙂

Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Parent Life, Postpartum, Weight

Try Again

I knew from the beginning that losing weight wouldn’t be easy. I mean if it was I would have done it before I had my child and heck I would’ve never gotten out of shape in the first place. My problem is my ever changing mood…

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When I start, I am very enthusiastic and upbeat. I plan, focus and go for it. But the minute I have a series of bad days or I feel emotionally drained I revert back to old bad habits. I comfort myself with food and cleaning rather than identifying the cause of the upset. I would rather go on auto pilot than deal with whatever is bugging me. When I try to motivate myself again I ruin it by thinking of how much further I have to go. Or I focus on what I could’ve accomplished if I didn’t mess up in the first place and this makes everything worse. This vicious cycle will continue until I allow myself to make mistakes without considering it a complete failure.

I know, like my previous posts imply or out right say, this journey is not a straight line. It is a wibbly wobbly (Doctor Who fans??) road leading to my best life and as long as I don’t die I can try again.

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Food, Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Weight

December Weigh In

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Note for November’s missed update: This month was a lot better. It wasn’t perfect and my stats will show that but I did accomplish some things that were on my list! Goals are November & December.

Yes, another post using the same exact picture but this time I’m pleased with what I’ve done. I started the 4-Hour Body again… My goal is to do better so one day I can do it perfectly and eventually try the “meatless machine” mentioned in the book. So far I haven’t had one perfect week but you know what? As of this morning I’ve officially lost weight. I’ll go back slightly by saying I gained way more than I’d like to admit by emotionally eating, giving up and having a looooooooong pity party. However as previously stated I am not going for perfection instead progress, healthy changes and eventually a new lifestyle are my main goals. And to my surprise it is working!! I don’t find myself binge eating on cheat day like I used to. I enjoy cooking even on cheat day which I thought would never happen. I also don’t dive head first into a giant mound of cheese which used to be one of my favorite things to do on cheat day. Bonus I discovered I actually feel better when I eliminate or limit dairy.

Actual Date: 1/9/2018

Weight: 229.3lbs

Measurements in inches (Forgot)

 

Goal(s):

  • Stick to some type of diet/ healthy meal plan (FAIL/ IP)
  • Read something other than children’s books (Check)
    • The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn – finished
      • I’m counting this because it isn’t for his age group even though I started reading it for him
    • Told Under The Green Umbrella – finished
      • Doesn’t really count but I enjoyed it more than my son. I don’t think there were enough pictures to hold his attention
    • Treasure Island – finished
      • Not enough pictures to count for him so I’m counting this
  • Exercise 4x/ wk (Fail)
  • Post monthly updates on/after the 8th for accountability (?)
    • Missed November but this post is up so I guess Yes & No

All in all October – December were emotionally hard months. My son has been testing his boundaries. I haven’t been sleeping well. I really haven’t been liking who I am as a wife, mother (to human & animal) and April thus the long pity party. Despite these feelings I managed to make the changes needed to improve. No I don’t have dramatic pictures to show off like I’d hoped; what I do have is a better understanding of self and hope for the future. I have clear goals written down that I plan on displaying so when things get hard I can remind myself of what I need to focus on in order to improve.

And for those reading this if you are in a similar situation: It CAN and WILL get better we just have to take it one step at a time 🙂

Food, Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Weight

October Weigh In

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So… I’ll insert details under each goal but keep the same goals for this month. Actually I might keep the same goals until I get it right. When I get it right I will completely change my goal or I’ll modify it to continue challenging myself.

Actual Date: 11/8/2017

Weight: ?lbs

Measurements in inches

Chest: ?

R/L Arm: ?

Waist: ?

Hips: ?

R/L Thigh: ?

Goal(s):

  • Stick to some type of diet/ healthy meal plan (IP)
    • I have made healthier choices
      • Ex: swapping coffee for unsweetened tea (most days)
      • Ex: Penny Date night (detailed post coming soon) rather than simply eating out
  • Read something other than children’s books (Check!!)
    • Jules Verne Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea
      • Side note: Adventure, Sci-Fi and mystery are my favs
    • Bonus points because I was able to read it to my son
  • Don’t use motherhood as an excuse (Umm technically check)
    • I didn’t but I still didn’t exercise regularly
    • I did maybe 3-4 workouts; progress but not my goal
  • Post updates every month on or after the 8th in order to hold myself accountable (Check)
    • Yup!! Though nothing has changed (well I don’t think so because I didn’t check)

 

Food, Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Weight

About My Weight/Wait

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Yes, this is the 1st “before” picture I posted but I look the same so I figured why not be lazy and use this 😉

You read that correctly. I waited to write about my weight because I kept hoping I’d have amazing before and after photos. I’m still over the weight I want to be, look like my “before” picture(s) and haven’t seriously stuck to anything. I tired the 4 Hour Body, intermittent fasting and counting calories but I always allowed myself to make excuses; motherhood was my go to excuse (avoids eye contact with fit moms). I don’t have it figured out and I will keep trying things until I find something I like but until I find my happy healthy plan here are my stats and what I hope to achieve.

Actual Date: 10/8/2017

Weight: 230.6lbs

Measurements in inches

Chest: 44

R/L Arm: 15.75/ 15.5

Waist: 41

Hips: 50.5

R/L Thigh: 29.5/ 28.5

Goal(s):

  • Stick to some type of diet/ healthy meal plan
  • Read something other than children’s books
  • Don’t use motherhood as an excuse
  • Post updates every month on or after the 8th in order to hold myself accountable
    • I am considering posting weekly on my Instagram @jtm2015.wordpress so I don’t fall off of whatever wagon I’m on that week

 

Hair/Beauty, Postpartum

Hair Update 7/2017

My edges have returned and hair that has broken off is also growing back despite the horrible neglect it has suffered dating all the way back to the end of my first trimester. I was so excited to see my full edges that I took pictures at different stages of the process. EDITED: After I added the pictures I realized there aren’t any clear images of my edges #fail

My wash day is typical of most found on any curly-haired blog/ YouTube channel with the exception of adding heat so I can trim my own ends. I’ll admit I’m not super into my hair like I was before having a child so I’m sure if you look close enough you’ll see tons of SSK (single strand knots), split ends and general unevenness but hey it is what it is and I maintain my hair in a way that is easiest for me. Without further delay my edges (and the rest of my hair)!

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Photos above are of my hair right after I washed it. It was still soaking wet but I was feeling it way too much to let it dry 🙂 However I did let it air dry (took 1-2 days) in big twists to minimize the amount of heat I used.

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1- After taking down twist

2 – Flat iron

3 – Trimmed

My bathroom is really small but I was stuck in there since I didn’t want to wake my son up. It was my husband’s awesome idea to put the giant fan in the bathroom with me so I wouldn’t ruin all my hard work with sweat. Needless to say whenever I flat iron it again I will be using the fan.

Life Changes, Parent Life, Postpartum

Nail Polish & Unicorns

WARNING: This is a random emotional dump so if you want more then read something else.

It has been rough in every sense: emotional, physical, mental and spiritual. The toughest being wondering if I have PPD or am having violent mood swings. The other realizing I am failing spiritually.

Instead of continuing to drown in my emotional state, I started to workout which I mentioned in my March Update post. I’ve since committed to working out at least 10mins daily in hopes I’ll improve my mood and alleviate stressing over things that are beyond my control. Well I was wrong. It has boosted my mood however the same problems exist and come flooding back as soon as the high of the workout ends. Today was no different…

Started the day by exercising. I’m currently doing Slim in 6 but I’ll do a separate post once I’ve completed the 6 weeks. Played with my son who was screaming MOM at the top of his lungs by the time I was done then clapped for me after I picked him up. We watched family vlogs until I got in the shower. I prepared for my appointment and this is where things started going wrong. The appointment was mislabeled, changed then rescheduled all after I had shown up for said appointment. I decided not to complain and just continued onward to lunch. The restaurant closed at 2 which was especially annoying as we’d been waiting to go back since Saturday plus we paid for parking but we found a different place within walking distance so the parking wasn’t a total waste. At this point hubby and I were both annoyed at the events, realized we’d forgotten something due to our extreme irritation and both expressed our grievances which took up all of our lunch. That is when I told him we needed to do something to wash off the stink of these events in order to salvage the rest of our day.

First stop was taking care of what we’d forgotten and that felt pretty good because yet again we’d hit a personal/ couple goal. Then on to Starbucks for the new Unicorn Frappuccino which my hubby described as a sweet tart ice cream. It wasn’t the best thing I’ve ever had but the name mixed with the colorful appearance put an instant smile on my face and changed my perspective.

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The Unicorn boosted my mood and lead me to do something I haven’t done in what seems like months; give myself a mini manicure & pedicure. I call it a mini because I didn’t soak or massage beforehand I simply cleaned up my cuticles, clipped and shaped my nails then polished. I was running late for my religious meeting (totally my fault I was 30min off…), messed up on a nail and ended up having an unpolished thumbnail but we made it. Once we got back home and were in comfy clothing, I polished my thumbnail and for some reason the whole day felt right. The weather was perfect (rainy and cloudy my favorite no joke or sarcasm intended), we made it to our meeting, our son was asleep, my fingers and toes looked nice, my hair was somewhat done (read better than all over my head or in a knotted bun) and we were relaxing together watching Founders which kind of turned me off of McDonald’s not that I frequented the place.

However my wow moment didn’t come until after the movie. I was deciding between going to bed and reading. I needed sleep desperately but I hadn’t read in silence in a while. Reading won; Chicken Noodle Soup for the Soul pt 2. As I was reading the short stories, I couldn’t stop looking at my nails. I caught myself admiring the color and the time I took to do it even with all the interruptions. Finally I came across a story that (like the book had warned/ suggested) stopped me in my tracks and helped me appreciate my day even more. I closed the book right that second so I could reflect on the emotions the story evoked. Finally the WOW moment. I was happy because of two simple things: Unicorn Frap and my nails being polished. It wasn’t huge but it sent me straight to my Gratefuls book which I hadn’t used since late 2015. I wrote down a condensed version of this post with a few extra more personal details and here I am. I felt so inspired I decided to add writing in that book to my list of things to do. I’m hoping it’ll force me to find at least one thing to be grateful for daily beyond the basics that everyone is grateful for namely food, clothing, shelter, family and good health.

I’m not sure if any one thing will help or if I need to see my doctor to make sure this isn’t PPD but I do know all these little changes will only help me even if it doesn’t fix everything.

Health/ Fitness, Life Changes, Postpartum, Weight

Weight & Stats – 2nd Month

Explanation (excuse) – As you can see there are no pictures, stats or measurements. The last week of the diet month was terrible. I could say Superbowl started me down this slippery week long binge but I’d be lying; there was more to it than that. I won’t give details because it doesn’t matter since it is an excuse. I’m not giving up or giving in. If it was easy I would’ve never gotten out of shape and unhealthy in the first place. I’ve set new specific goals and I plan on crushing them. I also plan to cheat wisely until I gain the willpower to cheat only on the planned day. This is the compromise I am allowing myself. If you’re physically healthy yet mentally deteriorating then what does it matter? I want balance and this compromise will allow me to find it in order to make a lifetime change and not a temporary one.

Goals for the Month:

  • Find something to replace emotional eating
    • Write down specific triggers even if it is as simple as boredom or I wanted xyz
  • Finish one workout DVD
  • Lose 4lbs

Weekly Details:

62 Days down (9 full weeks completed)

Week 1 (1/8*) – I failed this week… I cheated 3x on non-cheat days 😦 but I did ask my husband to force me to throw away my candy if I cheated again so my candy stash is no more. I still won’t give up this time. I’ve got goals!

Week 2 (1/15*) – Only cheated on my scheduled day!!! Winning 🙂

Week 3 (1/22*) – 2x but I know what happened. This was an emotionally intense week and I defaulted to my old habit of finding comfort in food.

Week 4 (1/29*) – 2x again but once was during a play date and I regret nothing.

Week 5 (2/5*) – All bad… Cheated all week long

*Weeks begin on Sunday because cheat day (Saturday) is the end of the diet week. I originally was counting by Monday – Sunday but that confuses me when it comes to making notes for a specific week.

What I learned:

  • Drink more water – succeeded
  • Incorporate exercise – failed which is why it is back on the list. Actually it would’ve continued to be on the list because I am going to set monthly fitness goals like the one I’ve listed for the coming month